How Fascinating!

The Italian Stud made a big mistake on our last day in Bansko, Bulgaria. Instead of selecting 5PM as our departure time from the resort. He selected it as our flight departure time so our transport bus arrived 5 hours before our anticipated time. 

To make the matter worse, the Italian Stud lost his voice on the last days of our vacation so he’s miming his frustration with lots of frantic gestures and pleading for forgiveness at this major fuck up. 

Cool as a cucumber, I asked the airport shuttle operator if they can give us an extra 30 minutes so we can pack everything into our suitcases and get ready for departure. A few more calls later, the bus driver agreed to a 30 minute wait and we managed to get back to Sofia, Bulgaria (albeit 5 hours early) without a hitch. 

The Italian Stud was super apologetic the whole time. And I was like “babe, it was an honest mistake. I could have easily made the same mistake if I was the one booking our airport shuttle”.  He looked at me with teary eyes of relief before I added back the spice to our relationship. 

“But if the roles were reversed, you would probably be super mad at me now right?” I sprinkled the spice generously  and he looked away sheepishly and mimed back… “yes, I would probably get mad at you . . .”. 

I laughed it off as a teachable moment in our relationship. And trust, there are lots of teachable and learning moments in a multicultural and long- distance relationship like ours (or any relationship for that matter). 

And today’s curiosity is figuring out how my attitude towards mistakes evolved from “oh I fucked up and my whole self-worth is at stake so I am going to mire in self hatred for days” to “oops, a mistake is made, let’s move from it and grow”.

I was reminded of the game/exercise “How Fascinating” during my short tenure as a creative consultant. It was a pivotal part of any brainstorming/creative processes because mistakes are inevitable in anything new or challenging. In fact mistakes are celebrated because often they bring an element of surprise or novelty that become a stepping stone to future success. So when a mistake is made, instead of blaming, ignoring, we celebrate it by throwing up our hands and shout “ How Fascinating”!

If I am being 100% honest. I thought it was pretty silly at first. I mean come on, it’s a tad corny . . . throwing up your hands and yelling how fascinating??? But here I am 8 years later and still applying the same principles to  mistakes. I understand it to be natural and common and getting mad or frustrated only makes the issue worse. 

So Italian Stud, don’t worry next time you F up or the time after that. Just remember to extend the same kindness to yours truly.